whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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