The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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