Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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