I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize
