hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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