hell yes lets make some ravioli
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
