adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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