OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Randomize
