After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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