I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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