Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
