I love having hate sex.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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