Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Randomize