haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
