at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize