VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
