Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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