OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
