He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
