The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Is her dick bigger than yours?
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
