Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
