You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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