In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize