I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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