How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Randomize
