just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i took some ambien and I TRIPPED out...i went into my mom's room to say goodnight and i don't remember anything...she said that i got really pissed at her because we were living in the Keebler elf tree and she was visiting other trees, then i started laughing hysterically and she goes "whats so funny?" and i go "there are 7 people sitting on my knees" and she goes "doesn't that hurt?" and i said "no we're sitting in a bowl" and then i capped it off and said "join the crazy train bro" and passed out.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
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