Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize