What a fucking waste of an outfit
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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