I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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