yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
