sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
