His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
