I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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