Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
