Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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