i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize