I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Randomize