I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
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