And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
apparently the secret to your success is patron
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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