I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
