dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize