I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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