My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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