i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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