I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
