I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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