good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
