he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
