its not stalking. its research.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize