Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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