"it" just moved
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
