So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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